Tag Archives: reflections

It’s a Bear!

I saw this lovely fellow standing next to the road leading from Wood Buffalo National Park. His coat was shiny and he was very healthy looking after his long winter sleep.

We stopped and then he stopped, and we looked at each other. He made no attempt to come closer, but just regarded us while I took pictures.

I am concerned at his lack of fear. Most of the bears in my locality quickly run away at the sight of humans, but I’m aware that on this particular road, tourists and locals alike will feed the bears, and they grow to expect that.

This is incredibly thoughtless and careless behaviour, because as the warning signs that are posted everywhere say, “A fed bear is a dead bear.” Bears need to be left alone to forage and to keep a healthy distance from humans.

A Rain Forest

Vancouver Island is home to very old, very sodden rain forests.

Many of the Douglas firs in this forest are 800 years old. They were little trees in 1219, when St Francis of Assisi was founding the Franciscans and Genghis Khan was a teenager.

It rains a lot here. A lot! As a result, the trees are covered in velvety moss fronds.

In areas where the sun gets through more easily, the moss is less prevalent.

These trees have seen a lot and are still standing and growing. It is our job to make sure that they can continue their life journey.

Greetings from the giant firs of Vancouver Island.

Cameron Lake

Is this photo upside down? Or right side up?

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This beautiful clear lake is in the traditional territory of the Kwalikum First Nation on Vancouver Island.

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It is very deep and cold and is popular for windsurfing and fishing. It’s said to be home to a water monster that can only be seen in the evenings. Bwahahaha. 😉

When we stopped there, the lake was mirror still and it was completely windless. It was quite amazing to see it sort of frozen like that.

The first photo is right side up; the second photo is upside down – it’s a reflection.

Random Acts of Kindness Award

Ursula from An Upturned Soul has gifted me with the Random Acts of Kindness Award!

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Thank you, Ursula! It was very surprising and very welcome. 🙂

Ursula is a truly gifted writer and thinker, and I’ve been very lucky to know her since very early in my blogging life – about six years now. She has become a friend, and over the years we have had many interesting conversations via comment-chats. Ursula’s parents were both narcissists, and when I was a beginning blogger and still sort of reeling from the experience of my ex-narcissist, she often opened my eyes, pointed to different interpretations, helped me to see that I had all the tools I needed to have, and very generally communicated that I was travelling a learning curve that just had to be travelled. Ursula is smart, funny, insightful, patient and caring (I’ve seen her really pour herself into helping a reader figure out narcissism or come to terms with it – including me), wonderful to know and I just love her. She lives her life kind of sideways, and I think that is what gives her her extraordinary ability to really see and know human beingness and to also work her way through the uber-demanding and extremely difficult set of crazy-making issues that growing up “in-narcissist” will produce.

From Ursula: This award was created by Mws R Writings, and you can check out the birth of this award and her vision for it in her post —> Random Acts of Kindness Award/RAKA – Mws R Writings.

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The rules are:

1.Tell who you nominate and why.

About a year and a half ago, I came across a very funny blog. I re-blogged one of  Brian’s posts because I couldn’t stop chortling and chuckling and I wanted anyone reading my blog to become acquainted with this great story-teller. Not only is Brian funny, but his humour is informed by a difficult childhood, a very kind heart, an acceptance of humanness in all its weirdness, and an insightful facility with life’s vagaries that not only makes me want to laugh, but also sometimes to cry. Brian is a blogging gem who shares peace, tranquility and insanity. 🙂

2. Copy and share the picture that shows the award.

Done.

3. Share a paragraph of something that impacted your own life in the way of receiving kindness or how you extended kindness to someone else.

When I was in the middle of dealing with my ex-narcissist, when I thought I was losing my mind and heading for bankruptcy, a very good friend of mine held me together. She fed me (in more ways than one), opened her house to me and listened as I repeated my fears, blamed myself, kicked myself, and ranted and raved. She provided a haven, gave me books (about narcissism) to read, and through her kindness required me to start thinking again. She pointed me in the right direction and gently prompted me to stop wallowing. C, you are the best and I love you.

4. Nominate anyone or share to your own page if you choose to participate. Tag or pingback to the original person who gifted you, or the original post.

That’s it.

I’ve enjoyed blogging a lot. I have learned a lot, been challenged to change my thinking, and have “met” many interesting people. In the meantime, I have been able to sort myself out in lots of ways.

What a great thing.

 

 

 

 

Are You a Dreamer?

I went through a dreamer phase when I was a child. I used to think about all kinds of heroic things, with of course, myself in the role of hero. Much of the time, I was basing my heroic roles on tv shows or movies I had seen or books I had read. I was Huck Finn for a while. I was a poor young guy who rubbed a magic lamp, I was a WW I pilot (Billy Bishop), I was several of King Arthur’s knights. As time went on, I made up variations on these heroes. I put a spin on them, if you will. They started to become quite different from their original incarnations.

These heroes were all male; while I dreamed, I inhabited a male persona. Eventually and as I aged, they became female, and then there was a short romantic period where I became the one who needed to be rescued, instead of doing the rescuing.

By the time I was about 11 or 12, these dreams vanished altogether. They were being replaced by reality, and I had to start thinking about how I was going to get on. Dreamers were nothing but dreamers.

One thing that I knew was that I didn’t want to be where I was, in that house with my troubled and narcissistic mother who tried to control every living thought and breath. There were some good moments with her, but they were few and far between.

My dreams became plans. How to get out and get away. There were money considerations, and how I was going to do what I wanted to do.

I knew that I needed to do as well academically as I could, and after that, it would be a question of funds. Where would that come from?

Eventually, I figured that out too.

In a way, dreaming saved me. Without it, I wouldn’t have been inspired to try to do something that wasn’t typical. The spirit of those knights and adventurers were behind me, exhorting me to keep trying, to not give up.

They taught me how to not need rescuing.

So for me, it wasn’t a childhood passage, it was a connection to a necessity.

What about you?

Are you a dreamer?

My Valentine

My M is my Valentine. And no, he’s not James Bond’s boss. (Thanks Ralph. 🙂 You can visit Ralph and his funny comments at https://bluefishway.com/ )

Almost eight years ago, I was introduced to a tall, loquacious, humorous, principled man. At first sight, we each were sure we would get on.

We did. A lot.

Enough that two years later, we got married, in spite of divorces and in my case, a dodgy childhood.

Our first date was in an Italian restaurant, and since that time we have not only loved each other, but we have loved to feed each other.

With food and wine.

With humour and tolerance.

With empathy and solicitude.

With patience and an open mind.

Have we had fights and disagreements?

Oh yes.

But we have worked through them.

I love you, M. Happy Valentine’s Day. Every day.